A woman judge in Scottsdale, Arizona, takes the prize for using humor to respond to a difficult situation. A male witness in her court room made the mistake of addressing her as "Hon." She looked him squarely in the eye and retorted, "I would appreciate your calling me by my appropriate name ----ATTILA!"

I began to recognize the value of humor early in my corporate career. I noticed that those who had the gift of making an appropriate witty remark---especially in tense situations-were often admired by others. In negotiation situations, for example, I observed that a clever remark delivered at the right moment not only broke the tension, but also helped break through deadlocks. I also observed that the folks who became even more serious and stern under pressure were the ones who were often the least successful in winning their points.

"I seem to have lost my train of thought----train? It seems like I lost the whole railroad…"

HUMOR IS A SKILL

I used to think that the ability to be funny was a talent certain people were born with. Now, having worked with thousands of presenters, I have big time evidence that it can be learned like any other skill. There is no doubt that to be successful as trainers, we need to be humorous and entertaining as well as informative.

"I just got my eyes fixed---now my mouth's not working…"

A recent university study on the effectiveness of using humor in fundraising illustrates the value of humor. In the study, the Director of Development of a major university included a short humorous anecdote in half of his request-for-donations presentations to alumni groups. The other half of his fundraising speeches were identical except he omitted the humorous story. The question was whether there would be any difference in the amount of contributions between the two groups. The results were dramatic. In the presentations in which the humorous anecdote was used, the donations were over twice as large.

A University of Maryland study demonstrated how humor increases problem solving ability. In a nutshell, two groups of students were given two types of video clips to watch prior to a problem solving session. The group who viewed the math video "Under the Curve" scored significantly lower than the group who watched TV bloopers.

As trainers, it is acknowledged that humor is an invaluable mechanism for holding attention. Professional speakers learn that they need to use humor a minimum of every eight minutes for every type of subject matter.

Humor is also recognized as being the number one rapport building strategy in professional life. Think for yourself of the times when, in building a professional relationship, you were able to use appropriate humor and it quickly advanced your relationship.

It is useful to dissect and analyze humor----to understand both the anatomy and the components.

Setup and Payoff

Humor, whether it takes the form of a one-liner or a long and involved story, consists of two basic parts--- the setup and the payoff. Just as the word implies, the setup is the part where we set our listeners up to be deceived. In other words, we create a false expectation--- we pull the rug out from under them.

The payoff, then, is the punch line where the unexpected happens. The moment of funniness is called the "revelation" and occurs the moment your listeners realize they have been duped. A simple example of the setup and payoff is the famous one-liner that is the trademark of humorist Henny Youngman. The setup is, "Now take my wife……." Much of the humor of the payoff comes from the pleading delivery of the word "please."

Recently I noticed a billboard at the side of the road with one simple sentence on it. Notice the setup and payoff----- "My wife ran off with my best friend--and I miss him."

"Last night I tried to eliminate anything in my presentation that was dull…. so in conclusion…"

The first potential target group is superiority figures. Everyone likes to laugh at the boss, the president, the general manager. Before we use them as humor targets, it is of course wise to make sure they are willing to be used.

The next target group is conflict figures, which includes anyone your listeners are in conflict with. People really are dying to laugh at their conflict figures. The most common conflict figure in our culture is probably the mother-in-law.

Think for a moment if you were speaking to a group of tax attorneys---who would their natural conflict figures be? The IRS, you bet. Tax attorneys don't want to laugh at themselves----they want to laugh at their conflict figures. Sales wants to laugh at operations---and operations at sales.

The best humor target by far is yourself---especially for building fast rapport with a group. One note of caution---you want to be sure you have at least a degree of credibility with the group. If they suspect you are a flake---it is not wise to immediately confirm that fact with your humor.

"How many of you in the back of the room read lips?"

The humor formulas will allow us to create humor that is spontaneous and relevant to any situation, Once we learn these formulas, we can put the content of any training situation into the formula and produce relevant humor.

The "Reverse"

The reverse humor formula simply reverses our expectations. For example: "He has all the energy of the South and the charm of the North." "This place is a hotbed of tranquillity." "He is slowly working his way down the corporate ladder." "If you fail to get this report in, it will certainly be the last day of the rest of your life."

I often use this reverse formula when somebody tells me that the picture on the cover of my first book doesn't look like me. I respond, "That picture was taken when I was older." We can now identify that "My wife ran off with my best friend---and I miss him" is the simple reverse humor formula.

The best way to create the reverse is to begin with a simple phrase like---"he's as sharp as a"----then reverse the concept and think "what's not sharp?" ----how about "marble?" So "he's as sharp as a marble." "That receptionist has all the friendliness of a pit bull" or "warmth of a vending machine………"

The "Contradiction"

In this humor formula you make a strong assertion, and immediately follow it with a contradiction. For example: "I never feel stressed---except when I'm awake!" "I have a lot of free time---except for evenings and weekends." "I really like my boss--- except when he's around!" "Our manager takes a stand---- except when there's an issue."

I have a friend who very effectively uses the Contradiction at the start of her presentations. She says, "I love to give speeches, except when there's an audience!" The "Obvious" The obvious humor formula is based on the many different ways to interpret meanings. For example, "I asked my assistant how he managed to be an hour late every day." He told me, "I'm very punctual." "Why did you write such a long report?" "Because I don't type." "Your contacts are great." "Yes, much better than my glasses."

You will often hear children use the obvious formula with such one-liners as: "Did you get a haircut?" "No, I got them all cut." If this formula seems especially lame----remember, the "Attila the Hon" story---it's the Obvious formula.

The "Series"

This is one of my personal favorites and is easy to use. It is based on a formula of "two pats on the back and one kick in the pants." Because the listener expects a third "pat," therein lies the humor. For example: "He would never leave our department---- he's too loyal, too decent ---too old." "My new assistant is intelligent, knowledgeable, and completely incompetent." "This meeting has been well planned, well executed, and a complete waste of time." "Those insights are interesting, thought provoking, and completely irrelevant."

The "Qualification"

The qualification humor formula is the most similar to the contradiction. You make a strong assertion which you immediately qualify. For example: "He's a great accountant http://mikebalzotti.com. not very good at numbers http://mikebalzotti.com. but a great accountant." "These turnover figures look good---they don't give the true picture---but they look good." "He's a super boss---never there when you need him---but he's a super boss." She's a great leader---everyone ignores her----but she's a great leader!"

The Personal Anecdote

Often the greatest source of original humor comes from events that happened to us---or even are told to us. It is useful to keep a humor diary and jot down the specifics of these funny situations.

I will tell this one when I'm discussing diversity:

A male friend of mine returned to the business world after ten years absence. In his re-entry position, he had two executive women reporting to him. He was smart enough to recognize that in his ten years of absence the status of women in business had changed dramatically His desire was to behave accordingly. Early on the second day, one of his women direct reports walked into his office. In an attempt to be at once thoughtful and appropriate, he blurted out the following: "I don't know whether you accept compliments or not, but if you do, you look terrific, and, if you don't, I'm sorry I offended you!"

"Oh good---another speaker in the group-I was afraid I'd have to do this alonehttp://mikebalzotti.comhttp://mikebalzotti.com"

Poor delivery can ruin even the best humor. Like the formulas for creating humor, there are some very specific rules of delivery that we can master with practice. Timing Timing is the most critical element. Most humorists agree that about 90 percent of good timing is to effectively use the pause. You will find that when you pause in some places, the humor is totally lost----while pausing in others greatly enhances the "funniness." For example, if you were going to deliver the line----"You can tell it's going to be a bad day when your blind date turns out to be your ex-spouse"-the most logical place to pause is after the word "day." Yet there are other places to pause that still work. Try several deliveries and notice the difference.

Delivery Speed

If we speak too quickly during the setup, our listeners may miss a word and never "get" our payoff. By contrast, if we speak too slowly------ our listeners may figure out the payoff before we get to it! Word Emphasis Choosing the proper word or phrase to emphasize is yet another major element in delivering humor successfully.

Read the following story and see if you can pick out the single most important word to emphasize.

An aspiring young executive who recently recovered from a serious illness tells his doctor: "I 'm willing to do anything in order to have a long life. What do I need to do?" The doctor says, 'Get up early, don't stay up late, eat plenty of leafy vegetables, don't smoke, don't drink, and stay away from women." "If I do all these things, will I live longer?" asked the young man. 'No," replied the doctor, "but it will seem longer."

If you chose the word "seem" in the last sentence----"right on." If you emphasize words other than "seem", notice how the story loses its impact.

A common error in delivering humor is the temptation to emphasize too many words which weakens the punch of the important word. It is smart to write out humor and practice delivering it by emphasizing different words to find the effect that creates the greatest impact.

Two Common Delivery Flaws

The first is to use too many words. Any extra words damage the punch of humor and lessen its impact. It works in some cases to drop subjects from sentences. For example rather than saying; "I needed a cup of coffee, so I saw a restaurant ahead. I went in and I asked the waitress…." To make the humor move you would say; " I needed a cup of coffee-saw a restaurant ahead-went in-sat down----asked the waitress…."

The second common flaw is to use abstract words. We want concrete words that evoke visual images. Abstract words tend not to be as funny. For example, the abstract word "psychotic" does not have the funny overtones that "weird" does. In short----" Down-to-earth is mirth!"

"There are two types of people here today---those who took handouts and the Republican's……"

Even with practice, most of us fear "bombing" before an audience. Here are several basic rules that will help prevent this from happening:

Rule #I: As professional presenters, our role is to be a storyteller or raconteur. We aren't stand-up comedians who have to make funny faces or use silly voices to get a laugh.

Rule #2: Our humor should always make a point that furthers our presentation. To tell a joke or story that is unrelated to our topic not only places us in danger of bombing---- but of wasting everyone's time as well.

Rule #3: Remember that humor works on the element of surprise. We don't want to make a major announcement such as---"a funny thing happened on the way to the office…http://mikebalzotti.com" Then the pressure is really on to be funny.

Rule #4: Following the principle of surprise in the previous rule, we want our demeanor to be deceptive. We don't want to indicate non-verbally that we are about to use humor. Let me ask you a question. Suppose you follow the above four rules; you tell a story or deliver a quip that you intend to be funny but nobody laughs. So what? After all, who knows you were trying to be funny? Just keep going------who will know the difference? They may think you're just a little weird in how you express yourself----so?

Another choice is to have "Savior's" ready.

A Savior is a line you deliver when your humor hasn't worked---and can often get a far bigger laugh than your humor. Typical saviors are--"Well, Mom liked it." Or choose someone from your group who is well known and say----"Doug, that is the last time I'm going to use your material!"

"This is the last time I get my projector from Mattel…"

The best and most efficient method to get the rhythm and natural timing of delivering humor is called auditory modeling.

The first step is to find a recording of a good humorist or simply record humor from radio or TV. (About four minutes is all you need.)

The next step is to transcribe the four minutes from the tape so that you have a script of the humor.

Next, while you listen to the humor tape---read your script, and focus on the humorist's delivery. Your task now is to model the delivery style of the humorist. It's a major confidence boost to find that---with a little practice---you are just as funny as the humorist!

"You can't scare me---I have children…"

Referring back to the "Attila" story, we can see the value of using humor to defuse potentially confrontational situations. The judge's humorous response accomplished several important purposes. First, she certainly got her point across. Second, she appeared witty. Third, she was in control of her emotions. Fourth, she didn't put the witness down or cause a defensive or negative response. As a former queen-of-the-great-comeback-three-hours too-late, I realized that if I could develop and practice witty responses, I would be ready for the moment of injustice or insult. So I have found it most useful to become a humor thief. When I hear a great comeback I steal it. I'm just waiting for someone to call me "Hon……."